By James W. Falcon, MSOL, CLSSBB
Considering how large of a portion relationship clients are of my total practice; I don’t have a reasonable explanation as to why I haven’t written more posts about relationship coaching related topics. Relationship coaching is also known as couples coaching, or marriage coaching. and, it happens to be one of the more popular coaching niches. As a matter of fact, one online sources’ “30 Most profitable high ticket business coaching niches for 2023” ranks relationship coaching as #4. Alix Strauss’ March 10, 2022, article “It’s a good time to be a relationship coach,” contains a number of statements from relationship coaches that all testified to experiencing exponential increases in clients between 2019-2022. It seems relationship coaching is here to stay now and for the foreseeable future. Allow me to do my due my due diligence and provide you with a working definition or an explanation of the subject matter. One online resource with which I am very familiar explains it this way…
It seems relationship coaching is here to stay now and for the foreseeable future.
…Relationship coaching is a life coaching specialization that helps people find greater fulfillment in their personal relationships. A relationship coach can help you set relationship goals, understand your current partnership, thrive inside your marriage, grieve a lost loved-one, or take your long-term romance to the next level( Noomi, Nd.).
…Relationship coaching is a life coaching specialization that helps people find greater fulfillment in their personal relationships.
-Noomi.com, n.d.
It is important to note that the scope of a relationship coach can extend beyond the dynamics of romantic relationships. Relationship coaches can assist their clients with conflict resolution related issues in family or workplace settings. Relationship coaches can help clients with grief management, or with relationship transitions, like helping clients find new relationships or by aiding clients in leaving abusive or unfruitful relationships. But the scopes can vary from coach to coach. Coaches like other helping professionals have specialties and may be certified in those specialties and select their clients based on those specialties and passions. Some coaches specialize in helping clients in the dating process, others may only aid clients that are separating or divorcing their partners. The point is the specialties are as numerous as the possibilities so I would advise anyone in need of a coach to take the time to research coaches they believe will serve their needs. Some coaches offer discounted or even free consultations. There are even coaching contractor sites that can assist potential clients to explore the possibilities and view a number of coaches in order to select the one they feel may best serve their needs. The aforementioned online resource, Noomi.com is one of those kinds of sites.
There are even coaching contractor sites that can assist potential clients to explore the possibilities
My plan is that this blog post may perhaps be the start of a new series. In either case, I spend more time coaching couples than I do any other demographic. I have develop a deep passion for relationship & marriage coaching. In the time since I opened my practice, the flow of requests for relationship & marriage coaching has been very heavy. For a year or better after my practice was founded, I’ve had no fewer than 40-60 requests in my inbox each day. I can always count on the fact that a large percentage of those requests would be marked as “urgent.” It was my relationship clientele who were chiefly responsible for the explosive growth I experienced in the very early days of my practice.
It was my relationship clientele who were chiefly responsible for the explosive growth I experienced in the very early days of my practice.
Sadly, those relationship clients were driven by the lock down mandates of the pandemic. All of the major relationship & marriage watch groups were reporting sharp increases in breakups and in divorce filings during the pandemic. Thankfully enough couples decided to brave things out and seek additional support and they reached out to me and coaches like me. Facing a new demographic of clients, I quickly obtained a relationship coaching certification to arm myself with more tools so that I could maximize my support of those clients. It didn’t take long before I realized that the research I conducted as a master’s student would come in handy for my relationship clients.
All of the major relationship & marriage watch groups were reporting sharp increases in breakups and in divorce filings during the pandemic.
As a student of Organizational Leadership, I immersed myself in study seeking to understand the variables that made up a solid, healthy, productive interactions between leaders and their team members. Interestingly enough, what I found was that many of those variables also work well in the context of romantic relationships. So, I developed a curriculum and off and running I went into the relationship coaching world. The curriculum I developed then, I still use today and I and my clients have been and continue to be thrilled with the results. There is no greater feeling of satisfaction that can experienced than to help a couple overcome challenges and value themselves and their partners from a fresh perspective.
There is no greater feeling of satisfaction that can experienced than to help a couple overcome challenges and value themselves and their partners from a fresh perspective.
To see couples whose modes of operation were formerly only arguments & fights rediscover the joy of laughing and communicating with their partners again is a magical feeling for both coach & client. The work, the investment has been deeply gratifying for me as a coach and truly transformative for the couples. About 6 months into my work with couples I developed a yearning to want to provide support for singles. My rationale was to aid adults in the ages and stages leading up to their connections with their significant others. In that manner the people and their relationships would be healthier. In practice if not in theory. This yearning compelled me to develop a curriculum and to secure a platform on which I presented a weekend workshop for singles that I called Relationship Readiness(c).
My rationale was to aid adults in the ages and stages leading up to their connections with their significant others. In that manner the people and their relationships would be healthier.
The initial presentation was as a virtual conference. All indications then and even in retrospect pointed to a successful virtual group coaching endeavor. The workshop prompted self-examination and asked attendees to honestly evaluate their mindset, motivations and behaviors to determine if they found themselves to be healthy enough to engage in a new relationship. The hope was to offer attendees the opportunity to make the necessary investments in their overall health and wellbeing well in advance of beginning a new relationship and to pursue Interventions immediately upon discovery. Due to the increasing popularity of coaching and the advent of so many relationship coaching specialties, there is no shortage of coaching support nor of online assessment tools. In my humble opinion, here’s why: Firstly, for the first time in US history there are more singles in America than married couples(medium.com, 2021). Secondly, Covid 19 is being credited for prompting significant growth as well diversification for the coaching industry as a whole(iwacoaching.com, 2021).
Due to the increasing popularity of coaching and the advent of so many relationship coaching specialties, there is no shortage of coaching support nor of online assessment tools.
The two factors combined have driven an increase in the number of coaches who have entered the market seeking their slice of the pie. By the way, that pie, according to one online resource, has estimated the coaching industry’s market share at $15B Globally in 2019. With 7.5B of that to be in the U.S.(xmonks.com, 2021) Another source estimated the market to reach $20B by 2022(coachingfederation.org, 2021). The coaching federation goes on to say “the coaching industry is one of the fastest growing sectors in the world. With more organizations and individuals using coaching services, there is an increasing demand for specialized expertise”(coachingfederation.org,2021).
By the way, that pie, according to one online resource, has estimated the coaching industry’s market share at $15B Globally in 2019. With 7.5B of that to be in the U.S.
xmonks.com, 2021
Presently a person can find just about any kind of coaching support they want. Returning to the topic at hand, relationship readiness, there are free surveys and assessments available for the daring. The results will give assessment takers a good, clear understanding of their need to obtain the support out of a coach. For the purpose of this blog and for convenience to readers, here are two tools that can be taken advantage of free of charge. The first is a 10-question quiz available on the consciousdating.com site. The second is a little longer assessment that can be found on soencouragement.org.
Another source estimated the market to reach $20B by 2022(coachingfederation.org, 2021)
coachingfederation.org, 2021
The bottom line is, I certainly didn’t invent relationship readiness. But I did have my thumb on the pulse of things enough to have at least recognized the symptoms. Me and tens of thousands of other coaches across the globe. The developments that took place within my practice were exciting, the growth was at times overwhelming. I never had a chance to settle into a groove and to daydream as I peered out of the window of a moving vehicle because the vehicle I was in was traveling at what felt like Mach speeds. I opened a life coaching practice that initially specialized in providing a personal development product that morphed into a virtual life coaching practice that quickly developed into a relationship coaching practice, that added infidelity as a specialty, that added business & career coaching. Yup. The run-on sentence was inserted purposely for effect. Yup. It was a lot then. And, guess what? It is still a lot and… still morphing and growing! And, by God’s grace, I pray that it will continue to do so.
The key in all of this is to be research savvy. Understand the times we live in. And always, always, always seek opportunities to retrofit your services around the needs of the people impacted most by the emerging trends.
This is where I have to add a note for aspiring coaches. The key in all of this is to be research savvy. Understand the times we live in. And always, always, always seek opportunities to retrofit your services around the needs of the people impacted most by the emerging trends. What we’ve learned two years after the unfolding of several major trends is absolutely mind blowing. Just imagine where we will be two years from now. The Relationship Readiness curriculum that I created for my clients is still in play though only in fragments and at sporadic intervals since its debut. Perhaps a revival of the subject matter may occur in my practice soon. I would be fool not to seize the opportunity to provide much needed information to those in need. My very last point may be more for me than for readers and it is simply this: keep in mind that the benefits derived from the coach-client exchanges are in fact for the coach just as much as it is for the client. Enjoy the journey. Peace & power!
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References:
DePaulo, B. (2021, September 19). The rise of single people. Retrieved from https://medium.com/fourth-wave/the-rise-of-single-people-739c4d838bd1.
Strauss, A. (2022, March 10). It’s a good time to be a relationship coach. Retrieved from The New York Times: https://www.nytimes.com/2022/03/10/style/relationship-coaches.html
The Pandemic’s impact on the coaching industry. (2021, September 2021 1). Retrieved from Integrative Wellness Academy: https://iwacoaching.com/?s=pandemic+impact+on+coaching
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